I left work early to take kiddo to the doctor. The doctor raked us both over the coals about kiddos weight.
She asked kiddo "Do you like being fat?"
Kiddo said "Yeah, kinda"
I'm so glad kiddo was honest. She prefers not being in the spotlight, protects her from sexual abuse in her eyes.
Then the doc said "I think you should lock up the food at night since she does well during the day and not at night"
WTF? Why the face? (as kiddo would say, but we know the real thing there)
I lost it, totally flipped.
I told her that absolutely under NO circumstances was going to happen. I also said that was the worst thing I could ever do to that child.
We've gone a long way towards developing our bond and trust that we will meet her needs. Locking up food would trigger her PTSD at a MINIMUM. Worst case scenario, our attachment and trust would go backwards. Not something I'm willing to risk.
Kiddo and I decided together that we'll work on keeping her active.
I do worry about her weight and food issues. It's obviously deep. I'm not, however, willing to risk attachment for it. Mental health is at LEAST as important as anything else.
So, those out there that have had kiddos with eating issues, what did you do?
Her therapist released her, but while she thinks she has an eating disorder, she doesn't seem to think it's trauma related. I totally disagree. The middle of the night is when fear can set in and she forgets the coping skills. She's fine in the day.
We provide tons of healthy stuff to munch on anytime she wants it. The problem is the binging in the middle of the night.
Doctor suggested we never bring anything bad in the house. How do you do that though? I get the no bringing chips and cookies in. However, she has been known to get into raw dough, boxes of noodles, etc.
I'm also not willing to shame her.
First home she lacked due to lack of resources combined with selfishness of the bio mom and boyfriend.
First adoptive placement, they locked the food up. I have ZERO doubt in my mind that that had even a worse effect on her food issues than the initial problems.
Wishing I knew how to best help. Mulling this over.