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Sunday, March 25, 2012

Mom for a weekend

the most precious weekend of my life was the weekend of my 42nd birthday. Lil Miss H was my baby for the weekend and I cherished every minute of it.



Having a hard time seeing how somebody else should be her parents. We fell hard for this 'lil angel.  I just hope and pray daily that she doesn't think we rejected her and that she knows both families wanted her.

She drew this for me and one for "daddy" too. We'll keep them forever.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Living with a broken heart


When 'lil miss came to visit, she told she was scheduled to visit another family too.  She visited another family the week after us. Despite having that connection and loving her so much and all of us feeling like family, her worker chose the other family, who's visit also went well.

My heart is broken. Why have her visit and then take her away for us never to see again?

They said we did nothing wrong, the visit went well, we had all the right trainings, they loved us, etc, but ultimately it was a hard choice and they chose the other family.  It's not normal to have 2 families actually meeting the child. I don't get thow that makes sense for either of us?

Will we ever get over this? I miss this precious little girl so much. My heart feels not only broken, but shredded into little pieces.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Bubbles and Baby Dolls

This past weekend we had our first weekend visit with Lil Miss H.

It was such a wonderful weekend and we love this little angel so much already.  It's crazy how quickly she feels like family.

We had a full weekend starting Friday night and ending Sunday afternoon.  Despite being told we'd have to fight to get her to take a shower, bathtime was fun.  Bubbles and water everywhere. We have a huge bathroom, which she seemed to find super cool and yet if there was a dry spot in the bathroom after her baths, I don't know where it was.

I got in the shower the next morning and naked baby dolls were in the tub. That's when reality set in that we really have a little girl in the house. Oh, how I can't wait for her to be back to us.  We miss her!!