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Tuesday, June 10, 2014

When It's Okay To Quit

We've always been firm believers in sticking it out when it gets tough and generally try to teach our child this.  Last year, kiddo played soccer. She didn't enjoy it, but we made her finish what she started and just didn't enroll her this year. The soccer isn't about us, it was about her, she can choose her activity.

This year, she's been playing softball. It was going better initially. Then all the sudden, meltdowns after meltdowns right before going to the field. She finally said she wanted to quit because the pitcher kept telling her how she was the worst player on the team and they didn't need her. We were livid.

Part of us wanted to make her stick it out, but this poor child has had a lifetime of not being accepted, the last thing we need to do is make her play with people that don't accept her. Softball is suppose to be fun, not a chore.

Yes, we let her quit the team. Yes, we told the coach why.

I was so upset. This is kiddo's first year playing, all the others on the team have been playing together since 2009. Of course they're better. Kiddo had never picked up a ball and glove before then.  I can't believe people are still this way.  I know coaches can't see/hear everything, but at some point, seems like they could have noticed some of it and helped address it before it escalated. They'd already kicked kiddo's BFF off the team for missing practice due to colorguard, so she didn't even have her support system on the field.

So, yeah, in our opinion, if a recreational activity brings back the feelings of rejection you've previously dealt with by having multiple families, that is when this mommy and daddy think it's okay to quit!!

Trauma should not intentionally be repeated.

1 comment:

  1. Recreational activities are so not worth the meltdowns in my book (but you already know that).