Thursday, March 2, 2017

The broken road

5 years ago today, there was a little girl visiting for the weekend that woke us up crazy early. She was so beautiful and spunky.

We assumed that since a visit was planned with us, it was because we were going to be chosen to be her parents. It's unusual for a child to be visiting multiple families.  During that weekend, she mentioned to us that she was visiting another family the following weekend.

A few issues happened with that little girl outside of the visits that caused her worker to delay her decision a little longer than we thought it would be.  

That's what we were told though. We didn't know then it was really a different reason.

We weren't the ones chosen and it would be several months before we realized that there was a grander plan that was coming true and the perfect daughter was just around the corner, one that we were meant to parent forever and would instantly fall in love with.

That delay happened about the time things were coming to a head in our daughters first adoptive home.  I'm convinced the delay was so that child would go elsewhere and we'd be available for our child.

Thank God for that broken road that led us straight to our daughter <3

I can't imagine life without her. The moment I found out about her though I knew why WE went through all we did before finding her. Every tear, every rejection was all a part of what needed to happen so we'd be available when it was time for her to be with us.

When I think of those visits vs the visits with our kid though....it was so different, I see now that it just wasn't there.  She was fun, we enjoyed it, but it wasn't like having a daughter with us.  Our baby even felt like our daughter from the very first moment we laid eyes on her.

I was exhausted when we dropped Ms H off after that weekend with us.

When we dropped our kiddo off after the first weekend with us, it felt like she'd only been with us a few hours. I cried that she wasn't going back home with us.  It was like the difference between babysitting and parenting.

Okay, maybe I do believe in love at first sight.

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